Sunday, 17 April 2011

Music Video Mayhem - Jessie J, Britney Spears, Lenka & Kelly Rowland

Jessie J: If Nicki Minaj was white...

Music Video Mayhem is back and this time, it's a ladies-only battle royale. I was going to write ladies four-way, but I didn't want to disappoint some creep who clicks on the link in Google expecting to find something a little more interesting. Oh wait, I typed it anyway... welcome creeps! We've got some exciting contenders today; current British 'it' girl, Jessie J, Britney Spears' second video for 'Till The World Ends,' Australia's former actress turned indie-darling, Lenka and Destiny's Child alumni, Kelly Rowland. Who's going to be wearing the crown at the end of the post? Let's find out. On a side note, a new addition to this feature will be 'best YouTube comment,' so get excited... there's some good ones.

Jessie J - Nobody's Perfect

So we start with this visual of a house that looks eerily similar to the one in The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, accompanied by a creepy British voice, quite possibly Jessie J's, before going to the worst cosplay Alice in Wonderland tea party of all time. Alright, I'm being a little harsh. 'Nobody's Perfect' actually does a good job of maintaining your interest. There's some cool visuals (like the black tar/paint covered Jessie, the room of clocks and exploding hallways) and more costume changes than a Kylie Minogue concert (some better than others). My problem might actually be with the song itself, which is a pretty big step down from 'Price Tag' and even 'Do It Like A Dude.'

Best YouTube Comment: "But P!NK told me I was perfect..." by jfwanify. Yeah, Jessie! Why you be so mean and destroy our delusions?

Britney Spears - Till The World Ends (Dance Version)

Because you were so mean about her dancing (or lack thereof) in the awesome original version of 'Till The World Ends,' Brits has decided to hit back with a "dance version" video. Suck it, haters! She's, um... sure showing you. Or something. At the very least she does that matrix back move (I'm so technical) which is kind of impressive. Final verdict? This wasn't necessary. At all. The original was perfect and Lady Spears has no need to prove anything to anyone. So she can't dance like she used to. So what? She's still a better dancer than anyone reading this. Yeah, I'm talking to you. But especially to me. Now, if only she'd drop the ridiculous charade (pronounced sha-rard) that is her live dancing and perhaps, sing live, she'd have nothing to worry about.

Best YouTube Comment: "Shave your head again psycho." by 90W7. Admit it, you laughed.

Lenka - Heart Skips A Beat

Simple. Effective. Creative. Lenka's back, looking cuter than cute and providing us with another quality song and video. This clip for 'Heart Skips A Beat' perfectly compliments the song itself. You're never distracted from the actual track and it makes watching it a treat. What more could you want in a video?

Best YouTube Comment: "Does anyone else thinks she looks a little like Keira Knightley?" by dizzy4u89. No.

Kelly Rowland - Motivation

It would appear that the beautiful and talented Kelly Rowland will need to motivate herself to come up with something a little better than this to combat the upcoming onslaught that will be Beyonce's 'Girls' video.

Best YouTube Comment: "wonder what they did after they make this video." by anuar95sky. They had a massive orgy, you perv. P.s. the word you were looking for was made, you can add an 'I' at the start of that sentence and make sure in any other instance, you start a sentence with a capital letter.


No one else stood a chance. Now, hopefully next time we'll be ready for Gaga vs Beyonce; 'Judas' vs 'Girls.' I've got a feeling that Beyonce will smash this one. Apparently she's got 200 back up dancers in the desert. Gaga's dressing up as Mary Magdalene. Good times. See you later, kiddies!

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