Wednesday, 10 October 2012

The K-Tizzle Sizzle - Songs That Sound Like Nails On A Chalkboard



What he said.

Songs That Sound Like Nails On A Chalkboard
by Katie Langley


Have you ever accidentally chewed on a piece of aluminium foil? It feels super uncomfortable and for a moment you feel annoyed with yourself – how did I let this happen? I should have slowed down and taken a moment to breathe before inhaling that block of chocolate.

This is how these songs make me feel. Not like the chocolate, no, like the foil. They’re irritating, they’re offensive. And much like that damn foil totally unnecessary.


The Time (Dirty Bit)
by Black Eyed Peas




This song is pure evil. It lures you in with nostalgia and then shits all over your eardrums at approximately 59 seconds into the song when it launches into the “dirty bit” breakdown.

If I was ever unlucky enough to be in a hostage interrogation type situation, forget the waterboarding, this song could break me.


Paradise
by Coldplay




Channel X’s promos for the TV series Revenge completely ruined this for me. Every time old mate splutters “para, para, paradise” I get the uncontrollable urge to yell “t-t-t-today junior”.


What she said. I think?



Firework
by Katy Perry




Try listening to the chorus and not think about a dying cat.


Price Tag
by Jessie J




This member of the pant-less posse has such unlikeable qualities. Just when I think the song might not be so bad I remember that she’s singing it and I’m right back at square one. 


Boom Boom
by Justice Crew




I don’t want to sound dramatic, but this is one of the most annoying songs I have ever heard. I understand that these clowns are recent castoffs from X Factor, or some like minded show, and that they made it as far as they did because of their dancing. So, why are they singing? With lyrics like “Calling all sexy girls/All around the world/Looking airplane fly/Up on cloud nine” I have to recommend sticking to crumping and worms, fellas. 

No comments:

Post a Comment

Love it or hate it? Agree or disagree? Let me know what you think!