Thursday, 4 April 2013

It's All Coming Back To Me Now - Shut Up. Shut Up. Shut Up. Shut Up. Just SHUT UP!

Excuse Me, Would You Mind Being Quiet, Please?
By Jo Michelmore

I found myself in a new city by myself recently, which gave me some time alone in cafes and bars. This was an enjoyable experience, as I got to spend my time eavesdropping on various people around me. Don’t tell me you don’t love doing that. We all do. 
One morning I came across a conversation that affected me in a way I’m not usually often affected in cafes, while enjoying my own warm beverage. The conversation was one in which one party preferred to use their knife and fork to eat their breakfast while their ‘friend’ chose to use their knife and fork as accessories to speaking, that is, waving them about manically while talking about, amongst other things;

...what they ate last night...which shop they bought their dress much the dress was...the salesperson who sold them the reminded them of their old next door neighbour...who used to go out with someone she went to school turned into a bitch...but is friends with that’s awkward...and hey did you hear about what happened to Trent...because Trent never told Stephanie what think I might order another drink...should I order another much is another drink...I think I’ll order another drink….

Sick of it yet? 

How dare she interrupt my delicious beverage. Not once did her dining partner make a sound, not a comment. He just sat there, eating his breakfast because the sound of her voice had obviously become complete background noise to him. To me? I was livid. It took all for me not to tip the table up, pick my chair up, throw it against a wall, take my lukewarm coffee and pour it on her lap all the while screaming.....

“Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Can anyone else hear this? Shut up. Shut up. SHUT. UP!!!!!!!!!!” 

Luckily, my thoughts led me to The Stranglers, from 1978. The chorus is where it’s at, quite simply….

”I said shut up, shut up, shut up shut up, why don't you shut up shut up shut up shut up....”


Which then made me think of a song that was always strange, by Kelly Osbourne in 2002, because she was telling other people to do exactly what I wanted her to do...

“Shut up, don't want to hear your voice, shut up, I'm sick of all the noise”


Which is funny, because is every song that contains the words ‘shut up’ one that makes you want to tell the singer to do just that? Simple Plan seemed to prove my point in 2005, because I just wanted them to… 

“Shut up, shut up, shut up, don't wanna hear it…”


Which then made me think of one that's a little different, because I probably didn’t hate it the first bazillion times I heard The Black Eyed Peas do it in 2003, but at one bazillion and one, I was quite happy to tell Fergie and friends to just....

“Shut up, just shut up shut up, shut up, just shut up, shut up…”


Yep. When I’m trying to enjoy my coffee in the morning? You – shut up, ok? Then we’re going to get along just fine.

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