Thursday, 8 August 2013

Where Is My Mind? - Ke$ha Hair...?


I googled 'worst hair in pop' and this image appeared. Excellent.


Well That's Not Happening...
by Jo Michelmore


It's been on my mind lately. My hair. Well, that is, not literally, as in, I know it's on top of my head, but my style. I love my 20's/50's/60's/80's/00's inspired hair, but every now and then I get a little bored. I have a friend who shaved his head recently and it's hot. I mean, really hot. Like, mega babe hot. I'm not saying I could do it, but what can I do?


I hav another friend who just chopped her long locks off & she looks a-may-zing. Like, beautiful amazing. Like, more beautiful than she was pre-cut, which is saying a lot, because she's gorgeous. That made me want a new style.


Even the guy that I buy my coffee from in the morning got a new style recently. It's not hot, but even he managed to find a style that he thinks works for him. Good for him. Who am I to say? 


So what should I do with mine? Chop it? Colour it? Shave it? I just don't know.


This brings me to where my mind is this week. Last week we left off on one of my faves, Jack White. Now, I'm the first to say I adore Jack. What a babe. His babe-ness for me though has less to do with his looks & more to do with his style. That guitar, those sounds, the understated style....but the hair? Let's face the facts, it's not good. Maybe I should look to some other musicians for inspiration....




I could get some inspiration from the early 90's and get something Kid N Play style, which is certainly a statement, but I don't quite know what that statement is. "I like Lego so I styled my hair to look like a Lego block?" I'd also have to start wearing over sized t-shirts and baggy pants in many colours. My style? Maybe not. I was never a big fan of Lego anyway, so that's not happening...




I could look more to the late 90's and look at someone like Keith Flint from The Prodigy. Now that's a hairstyle I haven't had before. Two horns of hair protruding from either side of my skull, dyed various shades of awful. I'd also have to start wearing chains, chokers and various piercings. I've already done the piercings so I might leave that one to the late 90's where it belongs. That's not happening....




Perhaps I should go further back and look at 80's Boy George in Culture Club. I already wear make up, probably a little less than Boy George, but I can work on that. It would be the preparation I'm probably not ready for. All those bits of stuff (what is half of that anyway?) tied in my hair? Who could be bothered, I have a tight schedule in the mornings and I'd have to be prepared to get reeeeally fat and quite creepy twenty years after this hairstyle. That's not happening....




I've got it. I look to someone from now. I get extensions on one side of my head and shave the other half. But that would involve me wandering around and saying things like "PUT YOUR HANDS UP!" and "TURN THIS MOTHERFUCKER UP!" and not much else of intelligence, Skrillex style. It would also involve people saying things like "nice Skrillex cut" to me, or am I the only one who does that to other people? Either way, that's not happening....




No wait. I'm going about this all wrong. I need to find a girls style to emulate. I've got it. I'm thinking Ke$ha. Cornrows, short shorts, an unattractive hoody and cheap gold. Lots of gold. That's me. Definitely. Except for just one thing. I'd have to hang out with will.i.am and well, the facts are, I don't like will.i.am and I have a funny life rule that I don't generally spend time with those I don't like, so you know what? Well, that's not happening....


Let's see where my trusted hairstylist takes me. It could be anywhere, like where my mind ends up each week. Who's to say...?


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