Wednesday, 19 March 2014

The K-Tizzle Sizzle - I'm Not That Innocent

Britney Spears and K-Tizzle: not that innocent. Maybe. Kinda. Sorta.

Sugar and Spice, and All Things Nice
by Katie Langley

Over the course of writing and sharing The K-Tizzle Sizzle with family and friends I’ve discovered that at times they have found it to be an eye opening experience.  At a family BBQ on the weekend one of my Aunties mentioned that it had made her wonder about her “sweet and innocent” niece.  I don’t blame her. Sometimes this blog post is rude, often crude - I suppose I do like to push the envelope. I like to say it how it is, and live for those awkward moments in life. Although, I have to say that when I found out a very senior executive at my very corporate workplace may have read my blog about 12 months ago I did feel sick to the pit of my stomach. Even I have my limits! 

I definitely have a sweet and innocent side (at least I think so!) but I also have a cheeky side that loves to come out and play. Sometimes those sides get a little intertwined; like the time I tried to convince my peers to flash mob a colleague to "Gangnam Style" (I demonstrated the dance during a team meeting). Or when I had a little (read: a lot) too much to drink at a black tie function and invited myself onstage to dance with the band. Or the time I vomited on myself while taking off my jumper. Yes, what you’re imaging really did happen – arms above head, jumper stuck, vomit with nowhere to go.

Sometimes being sweet and innocent gets boring, and it’s more fun to let your hair down. I know that there are many others who would agree…

Christina Aguilera

When this fellow ex-Mouseketeer initially burst onto the scene it was all sunshine and rainbows, although admittedly she was rubbing genies bottles and telling men what girls wanted right from the beginning. The skank-o-meter hit an all-time high with the announcement of her nickname “Xtina” and the release of “Dirrty”. One ‘r’ clearly didn’t convey how dirty she really was/is.

Miley Cyrus

Billy Ray Cyrus junior decided that long flowing locks and toothy grins were, like, so passé. She opted for a haircut and a new camera pose that resembles a dog in need of a water bowl. Oh yeah, and her new favourite hobby is cooking brownies, if you know what I’m saying.

Taylor Swift

Tired of being known for wearing large knickers and sensible heels, Tay-Tay decided it was time to let her hair down… And rub it all over every single man in Hollywood.

Justin Bieber 

It’s not just the ladies releasing their inner wild child. After engaging in a good old fashioned egging of a house and doing some fully sick (I need to point out the sarcasm, just in case it wasn’t obvious enough) graffiti on private property at the Gold Coast, I would say that JB (that’s what I’m calling him now) is a pet monkey away from showing us who he really is. Hang on…

Please note: I am not a drug taking, monkey owning whore -  I promise. My only crime is possession of a gutter mouth.

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