A.K.A IF YOU A FLY GAL, GET YOUR NAILS DONE...
GET A PEDICURE, GET YOUR HAIR DID
by Matt Bond
Mixtapes are making a comeback! Or so I quickly read yesterday on an article title that showed up in my news feed on Facebook, sandwiched between a billion Caitlyn Jenner pieces. Something about USB sticks that look like cassette tapes the kids can pass around instead of meth. We apparently have an ice epidemic, so I'm just assuming kids are passing it around. But the mixtape is back and don't I know it. Heading off home at my parents' place on Monday, my Dad handed me an old CD that said 'Matt's Music'. Now, I'm not old-old (just old), so when I made mixtape playlist things, they were in the form of a burned CD. For the youngsters, there was no fire hazard involved. It wasn't a literal burning of the CD. After spending a couple of hours downloading eleven songs (twelve if you were really lucky), you could spend ten minutes copying them to a 700MB or one hour duration blank CD that you could play in your handy discman or CD player. If you're lost on any of that, ask your friend Siri to help you out.
I used to make many a mixtape with all the latest "jams", so I couldn't wait to find out what was on Matt's Music'. But when was it from? What would it tell me about the kind of music listener I was whatever year it was from? Would I be ashamed? Not likely. It had my name on it, so obviously it was going to be amazing. I got into my car, put the faded neon blue CD into the player and was treated to the familiar sounds of Fat Joe. "Put the fucking mic on! Mic is on." 'What's Luv?' Featuring Ashanti and Ja Rule. Three artists that don't seem to exist on this planet anymore. I was excited. I remembered all the words, especially the iconic and thought-provoking lines, "you say you gotta man and you're in love, but what's love got to do with a little menage?" The following selection of tracks would lead anyone who found 'Matt's Music' today to think Matt was one fly gal. The flyest. I don't really know what that means, but you'd hear it in songs all the time back then. R&B jams dominated the charts and they sure dominated my chosen tunes of the time.
As there were indeed eleven songs making the cut on 'Matt's Music', the opportunity for a '10 and 1' presented itself. And since I was only mildly embarrassed by one of those tracks, that's what we'll be looking at. Ten songs from 2002 you'll be needing to hear right now and one you'd likely sooner forget. The flashback starts now...
by Fat Joe ft. Ashanti and Ja Rule
When You Look At Me
by Christina Milian
by Destiny's Child
4 My People
by Missy Elliott
What Would You Do?
by City High
Hot In Herre
U Got It Bad
Just Like A Pill
I love TLC as much as the next fly gal, but this has to be their worst single. The opening lyrics suggest they agree. "Dear Lie... you suck." Can't argue with that. I must have been caught up in the post-'No Scrubs' TLC hysteria that was sweeping the world way back when. Those were good times.
Alright... I can't keep up this ridiculous facade. I still love this song and I am ashamed but I don't care but I do. It wasn't even released in 2002. It's from 1999 and it still made its way onto a mixtape of mine three years later. I've got nothing...